By Alison Werner, Senior Writer

     Johana Trevino’s nightmare started in second grade when she was supposed to start learning to read. However, she could not. Trevino was diagnosed with dyslexia when she was in elementary school. She did attend special education classes, but the instruction she received never specifically addressed her reading problems. So, Trevino continued to struggle to learn to read throughout school.

     “In high school, [teachers] would make me read, but I couldn’t read. When I would ask what a word meant people would start laughing thinking I was joking,” she remembers. Eventually, she stopped trying to learn to read and dropped out of high school.

     Two years later, Trevino returned to the local adult school to get her high school diploma. However, she still struggled to read and understand what dyslexia really meant. She admits, “I didn’t have the drive to look it up, to understand it.” It wasn’t until three years ago, when she was pregnant with her first child that she wanted to know and understand her dyslexia. More importantly, she wanted to overcome it and learn to read. “I wondered, what am I going to teach my daughter?” she remembers.

     Last year, Trevino turned to READ/San Diego, the adult literacy program of the San Diego Public Library, for help. On her first day at READ/San Diego, Trevino took a placement test. Was she nervous? No. “I was ok,” she says. It was her second day that proved more difficult. As she started to work with short vowels, she was overwhelmed. “There were a lot of emotions. I was happy. I was angry. I was crying,” she says. Trevino was angry about all those wasted years in school when she did not get the help she needed—the help she was now getting at READ/San Diego. “[Those teachers in school] never did the phonics with me,” she says with a hint of frustration in her voice. “That’s where everything starts.”

     Trevino, 29, has enjoyed working with everyone at READ/San Diego. “They’re great,” she says. She especially has enjoyed working with Nancy Norcross, a tutor and Literacy Coordinator for the program. “Nancy has been so patient with me. She keeps in touch with me. She makes sure I’m learning.” Trevino says she prefers to work one-on-one with a tutor because “I can make mistakes and there’s no one around me.”

     In the last year, Trevino says, “I’ve noticed my self-esteem going up. I have more confidence.” That confidence encouraged her finally to share her struggles with her family. “I never had the confidence to tell them.” Finally, two months ago, she had the courage to tell her brother. How did he react? “He supported me and gave me confidence,” she says. All those years of struggling with dyslexia and learning to read caused a lot of pain and changed her personality, she says. Now, Trevino says, “I’m going to take the pain and turn it into something better.”

     Trevino wants to use her experiences to help others. “With dyslexia, you might think you’re trash. Everyone here is born with a purpose in this life, but the dyslexia makes you lose that purpose,” she says. Trevino’s new found self-esteem also has given her the confidence to talk to others. “I’m interested in talking to women and other dyslexics to talk about how to better their lives.”

     At READ/San Diego, Trevino has found hope for a better future. “I knew there was hope. I knew there was help for me.” And she wants other adult learners like her to realize the same hope and help is there for them. “Go ask for help. If it’s not right the first time, keep trying because the sky is the limit. I looked for the right place forever. I would get disappointed because the help wasn’t there. I’d say I did my part and just go home. You can’t do that. If one door closes, go knock on the other one.”